Live ChatJason Perry joined the Household Cavalry in 1997. After spending his childhood in the Scouts and the Army cadets, he became ‘hooked’ and decided all he wanted to do was join the Army.
As a driver, he was one of the first to know Britain was going to invade Iraq – a war he would later be part of. He now wants anyone who served in Iraq to seek help from SSAFA if they need it.
“I was 17 and a half by the time I'd sent all my paperwork. I originally wanted to join at 16, but my parents wouldn't sign the consent forms. And then on my 17th birthday, I said, 'In a years' time I'm joining, so you can sign it now or I'll be joining in a year.' And my dad signed it.
“I wasn't originally going to join Household Cavalry. I had an interest in horses, but I was going to join the Royal Gloucestershire, Berkshire and Wiltshire Regiment, which later amalgamated into The Rifles.
“Just as I was about to attest, there was a new poster in the recruitment office in Reading, for the Household Cavalry. It was a horse in full state uniform with a rider on, going through the water, with a thunderbolt going through the middle, and a reconnaissance tank crashing through the water behind. It said, 'Household Cavalry, best of both worlds.' And I just remember saying to the recruitment Sergeant, 'Can you ride horses and drive tanks?' And he was like, 'Yes, but you don't want to do that.' And I said, 'No, I do want to do that.' That poster changed my fate.”
I was one of the first to know we were going to war
Early on in his career, Jason served operationally in Bosnia. He was then posted to Combermere Barracks in Windsor, where his main role was as the Commanding Officer’s driver. It was in that role, that he was one of the first to hear that Britain would be entering Iraq.
“In civilian terms I was similar to a PA. In day-to-day barracks work, I would pick him up, take him to and from wherever he needed to go. I would work with his secretary to coordinate everything and prepare his ceremonial uniform.
“On deployment, I would drive him between squadron and regiment headquarters in the Land Rover and take him on battle group exercise. I would support him on operations and act as his radio operator as well.
“One day, I was driving the CO, and he took a phone call. He was told, 'We're getting D squadron ready to deploy.'
"I’d been watching the news and so had heard the rhetoric from George Bush and Tony Blair, and knew that things were escalating, but in that moment, it was confirmed.
“Although I was one of the first to know we were going to war, I didn't really think of it like that. I knew it was all happening, but the position and the responsibility I was in, I couldn’t and didn’t want to divulge that information, I just kept it to myself.
“I knew my best friend was in that squadron and that he would be deployed on that first operation, but I couldn’t say anything. It wasn’t my place. And although some of my friends and people I knew didn’t come home, that thought didn’t go through my head at the time.
“I was young, and probably a bit naive. Having seen the aftermath of the war, I am sure I would think differently hearing that news again.”
Why was it them and not me?
The invasion of Iraq began in March 2003. Though Jason was not involved in the initial operations, he was deployed a year later.
“I deployed on Operation Telic 4. We were there to stabilise the country and support the local people. That was needed particularly where we were in Southern Iraq, as Saddam Hussein had neglected the people who lived there. There was little wealth or infrastructure, and we did a lot of aid work and liaised with local police and security.
“To begin with, it was fairly benign, but problems were brewing in areas of the North of the country, like Baghdad, where the America troops were leading operations. The trouble spread further south and hit Basrah. We began to see the rise of Iraqi insurgency groups.
“IEDs (improvised explosive device) were being used and troops were being attacked.
“I was posted South of Basrah in a place called Umm Qasr. Two-thirds of the way into the tour, things began to get hairy for us.
“We knew the danger was spreading, and every day I was out on patrol, I was constantly on edge. I never knew if something was going to happen or not.
“There were times when occasionally, there was a pot-shot, at me while I was driving my vehicle, and it started to play on my mind a little bit. We were just driving in soft skin Land Rovers, with no armoured protection. If you were to get ambushed or attacked, you didn't have much protection at all, apart from your top gun in position from the top of the Vehicle.
“I think about it, and I'm lucky. I know people who have been blown up, and some of them are missing limbs or didn't come home at all. At any point, that could have been me. And I think about that now, and reflect, 'Why was it them and not me?'”
“I realise how close it was. But I also realise it was part of the job”
Jason was deployed in Iraq for seven months. During that time several people in his squadron were ambushed and fighting increased throughout Iraq. He even had a close to death experience himself.
“One day that I was on patrol, we moved up to Chindit from Um Qasr.
“We were returning late at night, and we were ambushed and opened up on.
“I just remember my Commander telling me to put my foot down, and I had top cover putting some rounds down, and we got out of the area, then the firing stopped. Luckily no one was hit.
“When we got back to camp, I looked at the side of the Land Rover. There were bullet holes penetrating through the side and in my seat, millimetres from where I had been sat.
“I didn't want to call my Mum or my parents and scare them, so I called my brother and I told him what happened. I just needed to speak to someone. Unfortunately, it did scare him knowing how close it had been.
“Because you go through that scenario so much in training, you almost go into autopilot. You don’t panic, as that’s the worst thing that could happen. You almost go into a standard operating procedure or a drill, it's afterwards you think about it.
"The experience hasn’t left me. I realise how close it was. But I also realise it was part of the job, and it was a risk.
“I'd already been to a couple of funerals of friends who had died in the invasion. I've never feared dying, which might sound odd to some people. But I've always tried to live my life as much as I can and enjoy it.”
It could be read in days, weeks, months because I was dead
“I do think back to it sometimes, but it's something I've put away in a box, and I don't really go back into a lot. That helps me.
“One of the things that sticks with me though is the goodbyes before I left for deployment. Friends, loved ones. It was odd.
“When we were deployed, we were told ‘hopefully things won’t happen to us’, but in case you didn't come home you were urged to write a letter – a final goodbye.
"I remember finding writing that letter odd – that it could be read in days, weeks, months because I was dead. I was 22, I didn’t think I would die, though obviously I know I nearly did.
“I explained in the letter my passion for the Army, and not to feel pain. To think of the good times. That I am not here, but I will always be here. It was my death letter, and it was weird to put that pen to paper.”
After seven-months in Iraq, Jason’s tour ended.
"I remember flying back over Oxfordshire into Brize Norton, and seeing all the green fields. It was strange, because for some time all I’d seen was desert and yellow, the green wasn’t real green. Not like back home. It was good to be back.
“At the end of our time in Iraq there wasn’t any decompression. We got back, we put all our weapons away, and sent us away on our leave. From being away as a fully operating unit, on patrol, on guard with your weapon, to being alone and told ‘we’ll see you in three weeks’ was odd.
“On my first night back I went to a club in Windsor. That freedom, and stepping into that life was so surreal. I was lucky I had a family to return to. For those that didn’t I could see why the transition was extremely tough. The ‘normality’ and silence. It meant many people went off the rails and couldn’t handle the change. They would be the ones who would go out, neck 8 or 9 pints and end up in fights. Luckily, the way they handle decompression in the military now has really improved.”
You served your country without question and you sacrificed for it
After 22 years in the military, Jason retired on a military pension, and pursue a new career as a civilian. He has had a number of roles, from operations manager, police officer and now works in security.
20 years on from the invasion of Iraq, Jason is urging the public to be there for the people that fought in the war, many who were injured or suffered mental health issues as a result of service.
"Whether we're talking about Iraq veterans, or Falklands veterans, or Northern Ireland veterans, just remember there are people out there that have dealt with things that the normal public haven't dealt with.
“And there are people out there that don't have a family or a support network that may need support.
“Even those who only had a short service, may have had to deal with a lot in that time.
“These are real people, and if you are able to fundraise, or if you can make a donation, then know you will be making the world of difference to someone’s life.
“For those of you who served in Iraq, and you have fallen on hard times, especially if you don’t have a support network around you, you can count on SSAFA.
“Some people who were out there may think ‘what was it for?’ the loss and the trauma. They may even question if they are deserving of help, but SSAFA would never question that. No one else would either. You served your country without question and you sacrificed for it.
“Don’t be proud, don’t suffer alone. Reach out.”
Jason is now a SSAFA fundraiser, having taken on a marathon for the charity, raising thousands of pounds.
“I’ve been raising money for SSAFA after I learned about their work through a good friend of mine. I know what they do for people and I want to give back, so one of the ways I do that is by taking on marathons.
“I will always fundraise to help the military family. It never leaves you.”
Jason joined the Army when there was a ban in place on gay people serving in the military. It was lifted in 2000, while he was still serving, but he says it had a profound effect on him.
"At the time I joined, I didn’t know if I was gay, or bisexual. I hadn’t worked it out, and I denied it for a long, long time.
“As I realised and came to accept that I was in the LGBT community, I feared people knowing and treating me differently. That was a fear I held for a long time. I wasn’t going to change, but felt everyone would change how they felt about me.
“I couldn’t have been more wrong. I was fully accepted for who I was. But it is strange, to know that the military I joined and the military I left were polar opposites when it came to acceptance. On joining the military was very homophobic, and it almost made me homophobic towards myself.
“Now, I am at peace with myself and who I am. I am not a different person, but know that my behaviour before was more ‘macho’ than is my nature. I never wanted anyone to be suspicious. I wasn’t as happy as I should have been, and I wasn’t honest about myself until late in my career.
“I was ‘outed’. I never publicly spoke about it, but I began a relationship with someone who was serving, and rumours and questions began. In a way it did me a favour. I don’t know if I would have taken the step myself. It got to the point where I couldn’t deny it.
“As well as SSAFA I am connected to Fighting With Pride, which aims to achieve recognition to all service people removed from the Army and stripped of titles, awards and pensions under the ban. What happened to them was so unjust.”