Chris

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‘I was mortified when my old section leader contacted SSAFA... but I’m so glad they did.’

Serving 38 years and being awarded a medal for outstanding service, Chris was a dedicated soldier.

Having spent a lifetime helping others – he didn’t think he’d ever need help; when he did, SSAFA were there.

From Banbury, being in the military opened his eyes to the world, but his world revolved around his partner Sheila.

A military man through and through, retiring and leaving his unit behind was hard for Chris, but with Sheila by his side, he looked forward to new experiences and quality time spent together.

The retirement they’d envisaged was not to be. In 2022, two years after Chris retired, Sheila’s health declined rapidly. Diagnosed with heart failure, she grew weaker. In December, as the couple counted down to Christmas, Sheila was admitted to hospital. She never came home.

Chris had lost his military family, and now he’d lost his love.

With no children of his own and his friends, all soldiers spread far and wide; Chris didn’t know where to turn, and things were about to get worse. The home Chris and Sheila shared was rented in her name; he had moved in years before to be able to care for her. Six days after Sheila’s death, the landlord ordered Chris to move out.

In icy December days before Christmas, his only option was to move back into his own small flat, which had been uninhabited for over a decade. Used for storage, it had no heating, no boiler, and a mould problem.

Battling with grief, Chris couldn’t see a way through, until his old section leader contacted SSAFA.

Like so many servicemen and women, Chris was reluctant to accept help. “I was absolutely mortified,” he said, adding, “I’ve never thought of myself as a charity case.”

A conversation with Peter, a SSAFA volunteer from the Colchester Division, changed his views and his life. Peter listened to Chris, gave him dignity, and helped him see that everyone, regardless of the medals they wore or the battles they’d fought, needed help.

Then Peter and SSAFA sprang into action, arranging an extension on the lease, giving Chris time to pack up 29 years’ worth of his and Sheila’s precious memories.

Securing funding for a new boiler, central heating, and carpets, Peter helped Chris turn his damp flat into a home.

Like many veterans who’ve spent years working away, Chris lacked community. With encouragement from Peter, Chris started attending a SSAFA run veterans’ group where he made friends and was able to reminisce. He also got to try new things he assumed wouldn’t be his cup of tea, like meditation, which has helped ease his anxiety.

Chris describes SSAFA’s help as ‘life saving’.

Grief is a constant battle, but because of SSAFA’s help, Chris and his dog Lily now have a home, and he has been able to see hope on the horizon. He has started volunteering; initially nervous, he now trains others!

When Chris faced his toughest battle, we were there.

When he needed a family, we were it.

When he had no fight left in him, SSAFA fought alongside him.

We don’t stop caring just because you stop wearing a uniform.

We didn’t let Chris battle alone.